That's Why Her Hair's So Big...

I have always been a firm believer that a good hair do is pretty much paramount to maintaining personal happiness levels. Partly because of the fact that I went to an all girls school, but mostly because of the fact that my mum is a hairdresser- hair is important.

I've always had a lot of hair. When I was little it was a curse. My hair was think and wavy and knotty and for some reason I spent most of primary school with it in a low ponytail which only further highlighted that my face is was round it was practically a planet. As a grew up it became the thing I loved most about myself. At one point my mum also cut it into a bob, so short she may as well have just sheered it all off and no, she still isn't entirely forgiven (who lets a five year old decide what's good for them?! I'm 21 and I still don't know what's good for me!)

Something about me was braver when it came to my hair- I didn't care what other people thought. I started colouring it at 10 (my mum had brightly coloured hair throughout most of my childhood so she really couldn't have said no) and it went on from there. In Year 9, I was threaten with suspension because the block of red running through my mane did not stick to the 'natural hair colour only' rule my all girls school enforced. Then, at 16, I went from brunette to redhead and never looked back.
It's been blue and yellow and purple, and orange and red and brown and it never scared me. Whilst other parts of my appearance have always seems like an uphill struggle (my skin, my stomach, my inability to have at high gap), I've always been at one with my hair- even if I have been ripping a brush through it and praying I'd wake up with it naturally pin straight (still no such luck).

Now my hair is pink. After a year of doing nothing but excruciatingly question each tiny decision I have made and not knowing myself from one day to the next- I finally feel like I'm being to regain control of me.

Between graduating, booking my trip, starting my internship, and the new hair; I guess I'm starting to see bits of myself I thought I'd lost forever.

So fuck it. Maybe this is narcissistic and shallow as hell, but I don't care. This is an appreciation post for my hair. It makes me feel good about myself and it reminds me to always be a bit braver and a bit bolder. Who knows, maybe if we all started appreciating the parts of ourselves we truly love a little more- loving all the slightly less great bits will become less of a battle.

-xo

Post-Grad Drams (I mean Dreams)

A funny thing happened about a month ago...
I graduated.
I popped on my hat and gown and successfully walked across the stage without falling arse over tit to shake the Dean's hand. I took lots of photo's with my parents and friends, had a lovely meal and then dragged my parents to everyone's fave student bar and got myself so drunk I vommed in the loos of the first class Virgin carriage coming back down south the next day.
Oh yes my friends, I did it.
Success.

Of course, reality soon set back in and I realised the bar job I got myself when I first moved back home wasn't actually for me, so I handed in my notice and got myself my dream job instead...

I'm going to be a waitress at TGI Friday's.

I know, I know, it's another hospitality job and don't I already have one of those?! Shouldn't I be looking for an ACTUAL job?! Doesn't the MMU website have loads of amazing graduate jobs I can be applying for?! But, it's TGI Friday's and I am me. It's a pretty decent combination when you think about it and I have always wanted to work in one, stupid as that may sound.
When I was younger, my parents told me that back in the day if you wanted to work at TGI Friday's instead of interviewing you, they auditioned you, which naturally, struck a chord with me. I have always had a love for theatre and drama, shocking news to absolutely no one, so the idea that I may one day have to audition for a job excited me (especially since I was about 8, and had no idea what an actual interview would feel like).
I figure what could be better than working somewhere that will, hopefully, be a fun environment, in an industry I have huge soft spot for, earning money to make my dream trip come true?
I'm 21, if I start my cooperate life now, I'll never leave. I know what I'm like, and currently I want to do everything all at once. I want to have a fun job and save money and see the world but I also want my dream career and a flat in the city (Manchester or London, no where else is really in the running) and drinks in nice bars and expensive shoes. In true Hayley style, I want to run before I can walk.
I talk to people in their mid-late twenties and can't help but feel a little bit envious. They've been there, done it, and are now actual human beings with plans and life goals who appear to have their shit together... Most of them insist that they are still just as clueless as they were at 21 though, so maybe the true trick to making it through your twenties is simply to make it look like you're making it through your twenties.

My savings account is looking healthier than it has done in a while, so whilst I miss city life and find myself longing for access to 24 hours Dominos Pizza (you know, just in case) and desperate to be able to go for drinks without having to drive, I know that it'll be worth it when I'm learning to Samba in Sao Paolo and learning to surf in Costa Rica.

-xo